


Parks and Rec one-sentence challenge | Leslie, Ben, Ron, April

by likeamigraine



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-08-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:47:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26166610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likeamigraine/pseuds/likeamigraine
Summary: - Originally published in 2012. Written for a Parks and Rec one-sentence challenge on Livejournal (>it's been 84 years.gif).
Relationships: Leslie Knope/Ben Wyatt
Kudos: 6





	Parks and Rec one-sentence challenge | Leslie, Ben, Ron, April

**Author's Note:**

> \- Originally published in 2012. Written for a Parks and Rec one-sentence challenge on Livejournal (>it's been 84 years.gif).

**Ben Wyatt/Leslie Knope | Road Trip, What if...**  
"Is it possible to die from too much unresolved sexual tension? You know, like, when you can't pee for a very long time and your bladder is about to explode, but not figuratively, literally, I mean, so you _really_ have to pee if you don't want to die, and maybe it's the same thing with sexual tension..." way to go, Knope, thinks Leslie, pissing and exploding bladders are the best anti-flirting topics ever. Pooping is the next in line if you want to make sure that tomorrow you'll still have your job.  
Ben looks at her with a puzzled look on his face, then he climbs on her small bed and kisses her and smiles because, yeah, he was thinking about bladders, and explosions and solving sexual tension before it becomes way too dangerous for their health, too.

 **Batman!Ben Wyatt/Leslie Knope**  
On his way out from the comic book store Ben sees another costume, a Wonder Woman one: it'd be perfect for Leslie, because she's strong and clever and beautiful like Diana, they could be a perfect match, Batman and Wonder Woman--but then, no, he remembers they can't be anything but friends and he's so glad to have the mask on, because his cheeks are wet again with tears and, really, right now all he needs is to stay in character with the cold-blooded repressed Batman in order to keep his sanity.

 **Ben Wyatt/Leslie Knope**  
Ben has been living all his life trying to avoid emotions, or ignoring them; but now he doesn't want to pent up his feelings anymore: he wants to feel everything - anger, sorrow, happiness, fear, it doesn't matter - and to take the risk; because Leslie is worth it, and if everything goes horribly wrong they'll be sad later, not now.

 **Ben Wyatt, Ron Swanson**  
His conversation with Ron goes from awkward to awfully-awkward when Ben lets slip that, at the moment, he's busy playing the new Batman video game, Arkham City; Ron glances at him and says: "When you are ready to be a man and fight for your life not on a screen, but in the real world, give me a call: I'll take you in the woods with the Swansons".

 **Ben Wyatt, April Ludgate | Some Spanish profanity**  
"So... do you speak Spanish?" asks Ben, sitting down on the couch. April looks at him and keeps stuffing her mouth with jellybeans while watching tv.

"Yes," she replies, utterly bored, her mouth full of colourful candies.

"I'd like the learn some Spanish, you know?" says Ben. What he doesn't say is: since I'm teaching you how to be adults, it'd be great if I could learn something, too.

"Okay," mutters April, her gaze still glued to the tv screen.

"Oh, thanks!"

Ben is a little taken aback by her positive response.

"Let's start," she says, her voice flat like Eagletonians' tummies, glancing at him sideways. "Listen and repeat: Me cago en tu madre (*)".

"Me... cago... en... tu madre?"

"Not completely lame..." concedes April. "But you must work on your pronunciation and accent."

"What does 'Me cago en tu madre' mean?" asks Ben, fumbling in his breast pocket to fish his notepad and his pen, and write down his first Spanish lesson.

"Nice to meet you," explains April, the corner of her mouth twitching in what could be a smile. Or the sadistic grin of someone who is about to teach to her fellow housemate that 'Puedo chuparte la polla? (**)' means 'What time is it?'.

(*) I take a shit on your mother.  
(**) Can I suck your cock?


End file.
